A horse walks into a bar.
He goes to the bartender and says “Give me a beer.”
The bartender is stunned.
He heads to the back of the bar to speak to his boss.
“Hey boss,” he says, “there’s a horse in the bar asking for a beer.”
The bar owner pauses for a second, then replies “Well then give him one, but charge him double. Horses don’t know the price of beer.”
So the bartender heads back out front and hands the horse a beer.
“You know,” says the barkeep, “we don’t get many horses around here.”
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To which the horse replies, “At these prices, I’m not surprised.”
A man walks into a barbershop and says
A man walks into a barbershop and says, “I’ll have a shave and a shoeshine.”
The barber lathers his face and sharpens the straight edge while a gorgeous woman kneels down and shines his shoes.
The man says, “Hi there. You know, would you like to spend time with me in a nice place.”
She replies, “My husband wouldn’t like that.”
The man says, “Tell him you’re working overtime, I’ll give you more money”
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She says, “You tell him. He’s the one shaving you.”