An 80-year-old woman was arrested for shoplifting.
When she went before the judge he asked her, “What did you steal?”
She replied: a can of peaches.
The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can.
She replied 6.
The judge then said, “I will give you 6 days in jail.”
Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment the woman’s husband spoke up and asked the judge if he could say something.
The judge said,” What is it? ”
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The husband said, “She also stole a can of peas.“
A paperboy said to a customer one day
A boy reads a restaurant sign that advertised fat-free free French fries.
“Sounds great!” said the health-conscious boy, as he ordered some.
He watched as the cook pulled a basket of fries from the fryer. The potatoes were dripping with oil when the cook put them in the box.
“Wait a minute, those don’t look fat-free!”
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“They sure are,” the cook said. “We only charge for the potatoes, the fat is free.”