“You always told me I didn’t look good with long hair and that you preferred girls with short hair. So I kept my hair cut above my shoulders at all times.
They laughed at me and told me that I looked ridiculous to dye my hair red when we were together. So, a week later, I bleached it again.
You would always point out if I was wearing too much makeup. (Winged eyeliner and mascara most of the time).
So I just stopped wearing it.
They told me that tattoos and piercings were sticky and ugly and that they tried to take my belly button every time you saw it.
So I took out my piercings and didn’t get any more tattoos.
You pointed out my stretch marks every chance you got. So I did my best to keep them hidden.
You pointed out every single flaw I had. So I lost every bit of confidence I had.
I did everything to be what you wanted. I did everything you told me. It still was not good enough. You left me for a prettier and younger girl. Someone you could mold and shape into what you wanted. Like you tried to do with me. And up until a few months ago, I blamed myself for everything that happened. You blamed me too.
But finally, I started to see the truth. You weren’t out of my league.
I was out of yours.
I wasn’t the one who wasn’t good enough for you.
You were the one who wasn’t good enough for me.
You couldn’t accept me for who I was.
When I took you the way you were.
Now, I’m here a few months later. My hair is pushed on my shoulders. My hair is light red. I have a new tattoo. New piercings. Once again started putting on makeup. I eat what I want when I want and I weigh 135 pounds. I still have my stretch marks.
And I’ve finally gotten my confidence back. I finally see myself looking back at me when I look in the mirror.
It’s so hard for me to get out of this and admit that I became so vulnerable because of a guy. Something I always said would never happen. It’s humiliating to even think about how low I got. But what gives me the guts to come out about this is the fact that I overcame it and I’m finally back to who I really am. – Feeling free.”
Always remember that you are as perfect as you are. You do not have to change for anyone and you certainly do not need to feel depressed because of someone else’s judgment.
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