Some people create their own storms and then get mad when it rains.
15 Warning Signs Your Friends Take Advantage Of Your Kind Personality
These days, many individuals are seeking to develop meaningful friendships with other people for the purpose of becoming healthier and happier. However, it’s important to remember that many friendships that individuals attempt to establish are unhealthy. In fact, many people will find themselves being taken advantage of by their “friends” at some point.
Read on to learn about several signs which might indicate that a so-called friend is taking advantage of you:
1. Their first instinct is always to talk about themselves, no matter the situation. Light topics include a story about their last vacation, their dating life, or their day in general. After about ten minutes, they might ask you how your day is going.
2. When they reach out to you they put in minimal to no effort whatsoever. Maybe it didn’t even start out that way, but eventually, you began to notice a pattern in their behavior. The exchange in numbers probably resembles 20% their efforts, 80% your efforts.
3. The times they do put in the effort, it seems more like a transaction than a reflex of caring. Do you ever meet those people who do things to be polite, and not because they actually want to? Ever look at your friend and realize that’s exactly what they do to you?
4. If they need more confidence, you are the first person they want to reach. You are really good at seeing the good in people. So you can easily find a list of their best qualities when they go fishing for compliments or if the topic comes up naturally.
5. They like to complain about their problems, but when you need a shoulder, they shrug you off or try to make it about themselves again. If they are in a rough way, you provide a thoughtful support system. If you are a rough way, they respond harshly in return and are eager to change the subject.
6. You can recall more than a handful of times in a row that you have helped them, without waiting to reciprocate. At some point, you started to keep track because you noticed something a little odd about the amount of sacrifice you were making for someone who barely thought once about you throughout.
7. Actually, they seem to be around most conveniently when they need a favor, too. Common phrases out of them include “Can I..”, “Will you do…”, and “Do you have…”
8. Many times you have gone out of your way or even your comfort zone for them. You do not necessarily consider this as a task because you did so with your own free will, but it did leave you feeling more like a pawn and less like a person afterward.
9. And whenever you try to point this out, they don’t respond with gratitude or acknowledgment. Probably because they thought you were the kind of person that was made for this kind of thing, so it’s not hard work for you.
10. In fact, they downright expect you to be the guardian of their feelings and secrets no matter the situation. They will either tell you so up front or continue to passively push themselves on you without regard for your feelings.
11. Then if by chance you say no, they either internalize it and gossip about you or become aloof towards you in the future. Both are manipulative tactics to draw you back into them while doing the least amount of healthy or productive work possible.
12. When you stop saying yes to them enough, they disappear without a trace. Or they don’t put up a fight when you decided to stop trying.
13. Sometimes you feel that your friendship depends more on your ability to give and their ability to take. You give because you are kind and sincere, but at some point, everyone has limits – even you.
14. The friendship, at some point, makes you think that it’s more of a drain than an asset. Because you genuinely can not remember when you learned something valuable the last time or grew from interaction with them.
15. You find yourself wondering how the relationship became this bad because it never seemed this way early on. Sometimes a friendship can go south if you do not recognize the true intentions of a person early on. You also could be doing something that allows the cycle to continue, so it’s always up to you to pay special attention to people you call friends. Choose wisely.