There was a preacher who fell in the ocean and he couldn’t swim.
When a boat came by, the captain yelled, “Do you need help, sir?”
The preacher calmly said “No, God will save me.”
A little later, another boat came by and a fisherman asked, “Hey, do you need help?”
The preacher replied again, “No God will save me.”
Eventually the preacher drowned and went to heaven.
The preacher asked God, “Why didn’t you save me?”
God replied, “Fool, I sent you two boats!”
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One day Little Jimmy was digging a hole in his back yard.
One day Little Jimmy was digging a hole in his back yard.
The next-door neighbor spotted him and decided to investigate.
“Hello Jimmy, what are you up to?” he asked.
“My goldfish died and I’m gonna bury him,” Jimmy replied.
“That’s a really big hole for a goldfish, isn’t it?” asked the neighbor.
“That’s because he’s inside your cat!”
