Two thieves snuck into a rich man’s party.
During dinner, they marveled at how even the cutlery was made of gold, and decided they would try to steal some.
The first thief quietly slipped a golden spoon into his pocket, unaware that the second thief had witnessed this crime.
After dinner, the second thief came up with a way to steal a golden spoon without suspicion being placed on him.
He picked up a golden spoon identical to the first and held it up in front of the party-goers explaining he wished to show them a magic trick.
“And now,” he spoke to the crowd pointing towards the first thief, “I will put this spoon into my pocket and remove it from this gentleman’s pocket!”
Stanley is looking for a new desk for his office
and he spots one that looks perfect in an antique shop window.
He goes inside and asks the shopkeeper how much it is.
“That desk is going for $5000,” says the shopkeeper.
“$5000 for an old desk? That’s outrageous!” exclaims Stanley.
“Ah,” says the shopkeeper, “but this is a magic desk.” He turns to the desk and asks, “Desk, how much money do I have in my pocket?”
The desk taps one of its legs on the floor four times. The shopkeeper turns out his pocket and, sure enough, there are four dollar coins there.
“Wow, that’s pretty cool,” says Stan. “Alright, desk, how much money does my wife have in her bank account?”
At this, the desk goes wild, manically banging all four of its legs up and down repeatedly for over five minutes non-stop.
“Darn, where did she get all THAT from?” wonders Stanley.
